"More than words..."

February 7, 2012

            So I am writing this just after noon our time, 8 am your time. So the day or two after the frog incident we walked out and we found one frog all by his lonesome in our kitchen area.

   Awe look, he wants a kiss, any takers? He may be a  

                                         prince or princess in disguise!)

            It was me who caught the little guy so we could set him free. I was freaking out the whole time. I kept praying asking Heavenly Father to help me get him and not let him jump away because not only would it scare me to death, but I just wanted to help him go outside and be free.

I will be posting pictures in this blog about current events then post the other previous pictures in Flickr. Our videos don’t seem to want to work on my computer. They go slow motion, then there is no audio. I haven’t tried Trent’s computer yet to see if they would work on it. The cyber cafes here don’t like my blog. The speed of internet is 1G. Therefore, our ability to upload pictures is limited. The computers are slow to begin with, and the process to do more slows it down even further. The computers eventually crash. So, I really don’t know if my upload of pictures today will work, I guess we’ll see.

            So the greatest difficulty I am dealing with is things not working here (the internet; places not being open when we want to go eat…they close shop during afternoon and then for dinner as early as 7ish; no guarantees that anything will be open when you plan to go somewhere, it seems like a guessing game that I can’t seem to win; the food is good if you find a clean, good place-yet it seems like there aren’t very many;)

People who are at banks or any other establishment that we need something done aren’t able to help us; and there are just so many small things like that, which make it so difficult for me to function effectively or efficiently-just the other day we went looking for three ringed binders. We looked at 5-7 stores trying to find something. (We wanted it for the business). All we could find were little kid, huge decorated binders with Strawberry Shortcake, and other cartoons. Trent likes to joke that all the binders out here have Justin Beiber on all of them. I actually haven’t seen any with him on it because the items they have are behind the times, it seems to me to be that way. The only time I have seen anything current and modern are items at the mall. Church-church friends’ homes, my home, and the mall are my favorite places to be so far-also the USA Embassy. It is so hard to want to be punctual, to be effective with work, school or anything because of how long it takes to do anything. You either have to walk or take a bus because a taxi costs too much. So we wait for the bus hoping it will come....sing with me now: ”Wishing and hoping and thinking and praying… Planning and dreaming, the bus will arrive, but that won't get the bus to come faster…So if you’re thinking how great it would be to have the bus arrive fast, All you gotta do is keep yourself distracted, through chatting and dancing and singing or something…Just do it and after you do, you will be sane.” Oh, yeah!!! Thank you, thank you everybody!!!

The sad thing is that I can’t take my kindle with me, my iPod or anything to help with waiting because the fear of being robbed. It is so unfortunate. I don’t mind it being difficult to do things, but what really gets me is the disappointment and sadness that I feel. Having to deal with the things being challenging has taught me a couple of things. I am learning lessons about Patience 101, but it really feels like Patience 500. I am just playing, trying to ease things up with a little bit of humor. Seriously now, the lessons of patience, compassion, love, gratitude. Today, I saw someone assisting who looked like his father or grandpa who was blind. I just wanted to break down and cry for him. I feel miserable being here and I am blessed with what I do have, even if it is not luxurious or 5 star hotel lifestyle. I complain to Trent about the heat and so much more and here is a man who can’t even see!!! Can you say with me “Perspective”. Wow, living here is difficult especially to walk around because of the structure of the roads, sidewalks, and building which are damaged from the weather. This man (who is blind) is not at home bitter that he can’t see. He is out walking around. I feel like such a big baby. I really wish I didn’t take for granted what I had back in the good ole USA. The place we are at is Ananindeua which would be considered ghetto in USA. Things are broken down, or stuff just doesn’t work. It really seems uninhabitable, yet people live here. Don’t get me wrong-there is usually at least a structure that looks modern with actual windows, but the majority of things are broken down. I look out the window of our bus ride and see the environment. I tell Trent that everything looks deserted and he tells me that everyone is probably at home sleeping or aren’t out. I told him, “No, it looks like ruins of a city that was once inhabited with people”.

(Trent just asked me how my blog is going and I told him in one word to sum up what I have been discussing so far…”mournful”. Hahahaha.)

            I may seem like a hopeless foreigner, but I really want to believe that I am better off having this experience than not having it. Could I be handling everything better? I really probably could be. I mean, look at those who live in countries that have shacks or no home at all. It breaks my heart more than anything else. I at least get to leave and go back home in April, but these people are here stuck in it. There are a great amount of people who suffer in silence or at least don’t complain. The members here are so happy and find joy in each other and in the gospel truth. They seek to improve their life here with what they do have or they work hard to achieve more. They are TRULY grateful with everything they do have. People on the streets, on the bus, at shopping centers are all solemn in the face, but I really don’t blame them. I probably look the same as them because of the heat it just kills ya. You feel like you’re drowning but it is a bed of heat, instead of water-you can argue it is water because of the humidity. I’ll give ya that. =)

            Lately, I have tried to bring some comfort in the moment and Trent and I bust out in song on the street as we walk. We walked with Raphael down a street and we busted or rather Trent busted out in song for me. I asked him to sing for me. I asked him to sing Vindicated. Here we are all walking down the street, with our umbrellas opened up over our heads. (Trent has his tiny black one, me and my colorful flower, butterfly umbrella and Raphael with this gigantic black one. It is so funny for me to see. It is like Papa bear, Mama bear, and baby bear with the whole sizes) Trent starts out slow and solemn…”hope dangles on a string like slow spinning redemption winding in winding out, the shine of which has caught my eye, roped me in so mesmerizing, so hypnotizing I am captivated  I am”…Busts out the chorus for all to hear…”VINDICATED, I am selfish I am wrong, I am right I swear I am right, I swear I knew it all a long and I am flawed, but I am cleaning up so well I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself, so clear…” faded out. When we passed by this truck, Trent said that  some guys said shoot or something like that in reference to his singing. I laughed. I told him, “love, I love your singing”. As we walked onward to the end of the street, I told Trent…”You know you really should have sang Britney Spears ‘Oops I did it again’. They probably would have enjoyed that better”. We all busted up laughing. We then started into the song slowly …”Oops I did it again…I played with your heart,  got lost in the game. Oops you think I am in love. That I am sent from above…I am not that Innocent!”…We didn’t pull out any dance moves, sorry for those of you at home who were waiting for that description and hoping we did. I don’t think we would have done Britney Spears any justice to her dance moves or her singing either for that matter. Hahahahaha.

            On a more serious note. The joy that has come from this trip is the transformation of my heart. I thought I understood what love meant, but being here has shown me a whole new dimension of love. I’ll like to explain what has taken place.

            So, I have had the feeling that I needed to study about what love really means, so I have been studying in the scriptures about it. I can share with you my notes, but really, it is a discovery I’ll let you do for yourself because those words won’t do justice to the experience that I will now describe for you. I will sum up everything of my study and experience into a phrase…”Love is more than words, it is action”. I’ll now explain what I mean…

            You may think that because I can’t speak the language here that it just must be so terrible for me. Well, I will agree with you on a certain level, but the lesson I have learned from not knowing how to speak fluently with anyone here is something I wouldn’t trade for anything. Why, You may ask. Well, how else do you communicate with someone if you don’t know their language…anyone up to guessing? Can you guess how it has been done?

            Well, let me give you some ideas or examples to give you a hint. First off, I want to explain the nonverbal communication that most of the people here have exhibited. I have come to observe their actions on a daily basis, everywhere. Their actions are different than what I am used to, to a certain extent. People back home would call it rudeness, and I have done the same until I have understood more about these people from watching them and my own interaction among them. So a brief description: When we are on a street and we are waiting for a bus, we experience a lot of nonverbal communication. What are they trying to say? Hmm..I don’t know perfectly. However, what they do is usually stare at me with no smile. They just stare. (I know what you may be thinking…”Haven’t their parents told them that it is not polite to stare?”-I don’t know. Hahaha.) We then wave for our bus to stop when we find the right one  because there are literally 15 or more that pass by us. When we are about to step on board 5 people step ahead or shove us aside in order to get on themselves. Then there is the cutting in front of me for things. There is the abruptness or what people would call assertiveness in the way they try to get what they need. Now, keep in mind that this is majority, but don’t overlook the minority-okay? I hope you are able to understand why these people do this, if you haven’t by now then I will later explain.

Okay, now here we go with another example. I want you to pay attention to the nonverbal communication okay? Now, come on. You know you want to play. Discovering it yourself is so much more fun. Okay. So When I was on the bus on our way to church this last Sunday I was sitting on a chair and Trent had to sit behind me because that is just how the seating can be on the bus. You are lucky to find a spot or you are separated from your bus companions. So I sat there on the bus, worrying about my hair because the curls were falling out due to the wind, the heat, humidity and because my poor Tresemme hair spray doesn’t exist here. Alright, enough of my whining. So, I see this row right in front of me with two seats, which is usually the layout on the buses, with occasional three row seats. (The layout is really like the buses back in USA with the two sides on the bus and an aisle in the middle to go down to find a seat. ) So the two seats in front of me had a guy on the seat near the aisle with the seat next to him- empty, which was next to the window. (The bus seats are cramped because of the way it was made. When you sit down your knees run into the back of the seat in front of you.)  The guy had no shirt, wore shorts and had his knees spread to either side of him to have space. This woman comes onto the bus who looked like she was late 30s or early 40s. She had a little boy with her. She looked solemn and reserved. The boy ducked under the bar that prevents passengers from going forward onto the bus until they have paid. He walked forward and was looking for an empty spot to sit. He then heard her call for him. He pointed to the seat next to the guy who sat in front of me. She grabbed his hand and pulled him near her and said something to him. The guy who sat in front of me was aware of them and just stayed put. He didn’t move over or anything. The woman and the boy stood hanging onto the seats or the polls. The bus stopped to pick up and drop off on the side of the road. The guy got off.  I waved to the woman and got her attention. I patted the seat in front of me and she directed the boy to sit and as she walked to the seat she looked at me as I was smiling at her communicating “here you go”. She smiled back with such a warmness that is difficult to explain. In that moment, I understood what happened. We communicated more with our eyes and face than we could have done with any words that we could have spoken to one another. The look in her eyes, as I interpreted, was one of surprise and appreciation as though no one does that here…looking out for one another (well, on the streets). I smiled in return, “of course, my pleasure”. We get off the bus and walk to the church. We made it just in time.

            Church has been one of my favorite places because of different reasons. One reason is…

(Oh, I forgot. Have you figured out or understand now why people exhibit the reserved or dejected vibe or when they are assertive/abrupt? Well, my theory is this: Take the observation of not only the individual him/herself but of the environment, their level of need. Those who don’t know Maslow’s hierarchy of needs I will give you brief overview. Picture a triangle. There are five equal sections of this triangle with base obviously being bigger and the point the smallest because of the width of these sections going from base-large to point-small.

The reason I am explaining these levels is to explain the level that most of these individuals are at. They are assertive or abrupt because they are at a state of survival here (they feel that there is scarcity or lack of things- or things are more urgent). In order to survive they may need to be assertive or abrupt and that bleeds into how they behave in most circumstances. When it comes to food, or even getting on the bus. They are pushy because they don’t know when they will see a bus that will take them where they need to go, especially home. The other night we waited over an hour for the bus we needed to go home. Like I said their environment and lifestyle explains and helps me understand why they behave they do. They are not being malicious. That lady who appreciated my kindness…why did she not want the boy to sit next to the person alone? It isn’t safe and you don’t know who you can trust, especially strangers on the bus. How do I know these things for the different individuals? Because the majority act the same way. Since I can’t really talk to them I have come to watch and observe. Actions speak louder than words sometimes. )

            Back to church. We made it to church. It was fast Sunday. I told Trent how I wanted to bear my testimony. I usually am really nervous to speak in public, but do you know why I wasn’t that nervous? I would be speaking English and nobody would understand me (Besides, Trent would be able to fill in blanks in Portuguese). I would suggest to those who do public speaking to try and think about everyone else speaking another language. It helped me a little bit because it lessened the scary feeling. Hahahaha. Well, I went up and sat next to Rose Mary. She is Trent’s friend who is married to the Stake President. She is the mother of the Oliveira family (they have two kids…a boy and girl) She put her arm around me and held me as I waited for my turn. She went up and bore her testimony. Trent then prompted me that it would be my turn in a moment. I got up and looked at everyone as Trent told them that I will be bearing my testimony and that he would translate. I looked at Trent nervously and then looked at the congregation and they giggled because they could tell I was nervous. So I proceeded to bear my testimony about the truthfulness of the gospel and how it is the same no matter where you go in the world. I also explained how I miss my family and friends. I explained how it is difficult to be away from everyone I know and because everything is so different here. I told them that Heavenly Father has helped me as I have read scriptures, prayed, and through all of their service they’ve given to me. I told them that even though I can’t communicate with them that I felt their love and felt like I was at home because church felt like home, and felt like they are my family away from home. I told them that through them Heavenly Father was helping me. Through the way they are towards me. They would invite me to sit with them in Relief Society. They would help me find the right hymnal page. They would give me handouts. They would just include me in everything. I told them that I was able to feel of their love even though we couldn’t communicate in words. (I appreciate their love for me. They express themselves so much in their eyes, facial expressions.) I told them that I am working on learning their language so I can communicate with them.  I told them that they were true disciples of Christ because the way that they live, their examples. Meanwhile, Trent would be interjecting with translation of what I was saying. Prior to us coming up, I had Trent tell me how to say, “In the name of Jesus Christ Amen” in Portuguese. He wrote it out how it sounded. I wanted to end my testimony in Portuguese. I spoke “ane (like window pane) no-me gi jazues cree-stow ah-mane” (keep in mind that is the phonetic spelling, not Portuguese). I then looked up and saw the Oliveira smiling so big and I walked off. Trent proceeded to bear his testimony. I couldn’t understand anything except, “me espousa”. (My wife). During his testimony, a young woman tapped my shoulder and handed me a note in English. “Hi! How you doing? You are not alone. I am learning English…and if you want I can help you to learn Portuguese. We both can learn. Kiss, Rebecca (your new friend in Para)”. After the prayer, there were so many people who came up to me. They all came up and were talking to me and Trent was translating everything the best he could. The first person who came up to me actually spoke in English. He is MTC teacher in Sao Paulo for missionaries. He has many missionaries come through whose main language is English, so he has learned a lot of English. He did great. He was encouraging me and telling me that with the Lord’s support that I will be strengthened in being able to learn the language. He said that everyone there will love to help me, especially him as he is on his vacation for a couple of weeks more to visit his family and friends. There were many young children even coming up and telling me that they want to be my friend. Rebecca’s mom told me that she could act out so we can communicate ( I told her we could play charades. LOL) or that she would learn English so she could talk with me. Talk about dedication of someone!!!! Can you imagine having someone in the USA from a foreign country, not speaking English and we expect them to learn our language in order to communicate with us. Here this lady wants to do everything she can to make me feel comfortable and not alone. Wow, (can "wow" be said too much?!!) Trent went off and left me with Raphael Azevedo and Raphael Oliveira. They were translating for me what everyone was saying. Raphael Oliveira ended up leaving, but not before we all could take pictures together. 

Missionary, Elder Stacy. He is from Plumas Lake, California...Aunt Tulan and Unlce Justin, he knows you...

 Back: Joelson (Priscilla's fiance),Raphael Oliveira's family: Priscilla Oliveira (sister), Rose Mary Oliveira (mom), Raphael Azevedo (our business partner), President Olieveira (dad) .

                           

Raphael Azevedo was having a hard time keeping up with the translating a little bit, but don’t worry we had a English/Portuguese dictionary. Brother Durval came up and spoke to me. He and his wife invited us over weeks ago for Family Home Evening, but we didn’t make it. That day was the Monday after our first Sunday here and I was struggling so bad. I just didn’t want to go anywhere. We didn’t have a cell phone or their number, so we couldn’t call and explain. We didn’t show and they were concerned. Trent explained and they felt really bad. They discussed that later might help. Well, Druval explained through Raphael that his wife and him prayed about me. They asked to understand what it must be like for me here away from my family. He said that they learned about what I am going through. They said they cried because they understood how I am feeling. Can you imagine???!!!! Someone praying to have empathy for me, to be able to understand how I was feeling because they couldn’t really talk to me and because they wanted  to help in any way they could. He even invited us over that night for dinner. (I think I told you, but maybe not. We have church at 3:30 PM so we don’t get done until after 6 PM. Church at night…interesting huh?) Dinner was fantastic. I was so touched by them. They are so spiritual and you could feel it in their home. They have the Holy Ghost with them. They are inspired. So they made beef stroganoff. Their kids ate left over fish because they wanted to make sure we had enough, familiar food. They gave us homemade juice, jelly and crackers, and so much more. Then Andresa was telling us jokes. This is my favorite: The teacher gave all the students homework. The assignment was to go home and come back the next day with three phrases. So Johnny goes home and walks up to his mom in the kitchen who was cooking. He asks her to give him a phrase and she says,” Shut up, leave me alone”. Then he goes to his brother Charlie and asks for a phrase from him.  Charlie was watching a Batman cartoon and says, “I’m batman”. Then he goes up to his dad who was singing a song and asks him for a phrase. His dad sings, “I’ll take a taxi”. He returns to school the next day and his teacher calls upon Johnny to come up and give his phrases. He responds, “Shut up, leave me alone”. The teacher says, “You can’t talk to me like that. Who do you think you are?”. He responds, “I’m Batman!”. She says, “Go to the principal’s office”. He responds, “I’ll take a taxi”.

 Oh, my goodness!!!! I am cracking up right now and giggling because it is so funny!!!

                          Beautiful family: Andresa, Arthur, Durval, and Rosana

Trent played Brother Druval’s acoustic guitar a little bit. Brother Durval played this song on his guitar “More than Words” and Trent sang…”Saying the words I love you are not the words I want to hear from you, It is not that I want you not to say but if you only knew how easy it would be to show me how you feel, Chorus: More than words was all I ever needed you to show that your love for me is real, then you wouldn’t have to say you love me because I’d already know”

He continued throughout the song. The reason this song meant so much to me is because earlier when Brother Durval and I spoke we understood how his wife and him understood what I have been feeling, which was through the Holy Ghost and their hearts. We understand how I am feeling everyone’s love for me and it is more than words. I have come to understand that love is not merely expressing in words, but action. I have to say that loving someone in action more than words is a whole other dimension that can’t be understood until experienced. The people here don’t think of themselves as much as they do for each other, especially for me. They think about how to help me feel like I’m at home. They try to help me feel happy and comfortable. They sacrifice what they want or need so that I can have everything I need. The sacrifice is like a duty to their fellowman. Can you imagine being that way? Can you imagine life living with bare minimums to survive and giving to others who don’t even have that? Can you imagine praying for someone to understand and have empathy for them because you want to help them? Can you imagine such faith? Can you imagine traveling to the temple on a bus for 32 hours on roads that are bumpy and need to be repaved because of potholes? Can you imagine living each day for your God and your fellowmen? Having material objects be last on your mind?

            Can you go out this week to love someone in this way? Can you be observant and not hear someone’s words of “Oh, I’m okay” and see that their nonverbal communication is indicating something is wrong. Can you pray to understand and help another in need? Can you put aside personal opinion or biases that you think you know about someone, but really it is assumptions and truly letting go and trying to help or even just love them?

            I think many of you have and do this often. I think many people at one moment or another experience this in their life. I think we can forget or be distracted. Can we love strangers? Can we love others as the good Samaritan? I love this scripture I recently read in Luke… I can’t find it, but basically is about how it is easy to love someone we know, but we don’t gain much from it. We gain more from loving someone who we may not get along well with. I’ll let you know when I find it.

            I like this Stacie Orrico song, “A Beautiful Awakening”.

             “A beautiful awakening has happened in my soul, a beautiful awakening that only I could know. Try to imagine a song that you never heard, a color you have never seen. Try to describe a taste you have not tasted then maybe you’ll know what I mean. A beautiful awakening has happened in my soul, a beautiful awakening that only I could know. Can you imagine if you spent your whole life with a heart beating out of time. Then one day your wild heart found its rhythm, don’t you think you would lose your mind? A beautiful awakening has happened in my soul, a beautiful awakening that only I could know. What if you woke up one day and your eyes could see ugly things as beautiful, ay…Would you believe it if you fell in love with a stranger would you be doubtful?A beautiful awakening has happened in my soul A beautiful awakening that only I could know. When I looked at you My heart already knew. You had come to breathe life into my dormant soul. I was terrified. I'm not afraid anymore Cause I know that you embrace my heart and I feel alive. Yeah yeah, ohh. A beautiful awakening has happened in my soul
A beautiful awakening that only I could know. A beautiful awakening has happened in my soul
And I know that you know. A beautiful awakening

            I want you all to know that I love you. I hope that I can show love for deeply than I have before, for I can see the way to love is more than words…

More pictures from Ver O Rio

Trip to Ver o Rio

More pictures, this time of food. They´re greeeat!

Here´s to hoping pictures post!

 Our clean bathroom after Emily cleaned it up. Notice the tape everywhere?

 Rugs and towels and such make it feel so much more clean!

Who let the frogs out?

February 2, 2012

            Alright, everyone…here we are at the start of February…it has been about two weeks. So far I have survived. I am better than I was to be quite honest. Don’t think that everything is peachy, but it is becoming less traumatizing. I know many of you may think I am just a drama queen, which I can accept. However, if you stayed here I wonder how crazy you would get. =)

            Well, the way Trent and I are handling my stay here is manageable. He has me come out on some days and lets me stay home on other days. Off and on approach helps me adapt better.

            Yesterday, we went out with Raphael to The United States of America Embassy!!!! (We went there to register, so they know we exist here and where to find us) Wow, can you imagine my excitement!!!! American soil, is what Raphael calls it. When you step in it is like stepping into the United States, but when you leave you are back in Brazil. Hahahahaha. Let me tell you! Whoa, I was so excited because I feel so far from home. I saw the American flag, which was so big, and red-white-and blue. Everything was so beautiful inside, even though really it was small and plain. I was amazed though. They had things in English. The secretary spoke English with me. The forms were in English. The registration person who helped us is actually a member of the church and he works at that Belem Embassy location off and on. His family is there with him and their stay is for two years. They leave in six months to their next location. I felt so at home. Everything worked out great. I asked for advice…what he told me was “well, you lock your doors as you would in Cali, you want to wash all your produce because there are no regulations on pesticides here and they use a lot because there are so many more bugs. You want to protect your Passport because it is very valuable in the black market…if it goes lost or stolen to report it immediately (can you say with me-freaky!!!) and he said to travel and check out more of Brazil because there is more to see and more developed parts worth seeing.

            I was relieved and so excited. We walked around Belem, took a bus to the mall. Now, the walk was pretty amazing I have to admit. Not as bad as where we live. The streets were kept up nice and neat. The roads and sidewalk were broken up a bit, but not too shabby compared to what I live in. The smell is not as crazy, funky. The heat is not as hot either. (You must be wondering with me, why aren’t you living in Belem then? Well, it is just one of those things-which helps me appreciate life that much more) The buses were AMAZING! They looked just like the buses in good ole USA. They were clean, and had handicap spot on it, unlike other buses here. The ride didn’t seem as scary. We got to the mall and it was so COOL! I am telling you, I feel Trent is playing a sick joke on me with where he is having me stay. LOL. The places in Belem seem so much more normal. However, the bridge over the creek or whatever you want to call it smelled soooooo bad!!!! Why? Well, it is the above ground sewage. EWE!!! You gotta take the good, the bad, and the ugly. I liked focusing on the good!!! Back to the mall. Okay, so we walk in and we find me the cutest, cheapest, PINK phone. I had no cell and now I am powered and ready. We just window shopped. I looked at clothes, really interesting Brazilian souvenirs. We walked and walked and walked. No, seriously we walked a long time because the mall had like 8 floors it seemed like. I have never been in a mall that big. It reminded me of the labyrinth or the castle in Harry Potter. There were like secret passage ways ( I’m kidding of course, but you would be inside then all of the sudden outside in a parking garage then inside again. ) They had a whole floor dedicated to food (food courts) and candy. There was also a game or arcade store or hang out place on the same floor. On another floor was the movie theatre. There was just no end to the fun. I am sure it is like Disney Land, even though I have never been to Disney Land. Okay, so we hung out and chatted with Raphael. Yes, Trent still has to translate everything, but I am learning still. I catch a few phrases. We each got our own meals at the food court. Emily- Chinese food, Trent-Brazilian of course, Raphael-Hamburger, fries, and a soda. (Each of us desiring a place we may want to be <me not China, but USA home Chinese takeout).  So Raphael was hilarious all night. He was singing, “Who let the dawgs out! Whoo Whoo!!” He sang the USA anthem. On the bus, Trent asked him something about water. Then he took is free cup from the hamburger place (Bob’s-or something like that) and pretended there was water in it and that it was freezing cold. He offered us some and we declined. He then said, “Okay” and poured it out. He was so silly. Made the scary bus ride not seem so bumpy and hot. He has been a lifesaver since we have been here. We both would go crazy if it weren’t for his kindness, generosity, humor, and support. He is one of the things that is helping us to cope. Good guy. J

Portuguese lesson:

            Practice with me…don’t leave me hangin’.

            Alright. Here we go:

            Ele (elee) esta (ehstah) commendo (coemendo). (He is eating).

            Ela (elah) esta nadando. (She is swimming).

            O Homen (omen) esta bebendo (buhbendoe) (The man is drinking)

(plural) Os Homens estao bebendo. (The men are drinking.)

            A Mulher (mulyere) esta escrevendo. (The woman is writing).

            (plural) As Mulher estao escrevendo (The women are writing)

O minino (meeneeno) esta coziando. (The boy is cooking)

A minina (meeneena) esta cozinando. (The girl is cooking.)

Here are some phrases.

 Mi disculpe (meh dehsculpeh)

(I’m sorry). Lamento (I’m sorry for what happened to you).

Obrigada <feminine> Obrigado <male> (thank you)

 Denada (jehnada) (you’re welcome).

Com lucensa (Comb lusensa) (excuse me)

Sim (seem) (yes)

Nao (nah) (no)

Alright,

Now onto crazier things.
 
So Raphael thinks I’m crazy for wanting to scrub the floor by hand. They just use a broom with a cloth. Okay, I was brave and got on my hands and knees and scrubbed the bathroom floor. Guess how beautiful it turned out!!! It was shiny white and made me feel super proud.

            Here is the crazy part. I have this thing about bugs. I got plastic and the two inch tape Trent got for me and I went through our place and taped all the nooks and crannies. I used the plastic for the bathroom window because as you remember the carved out stone window has no screen, so friendly bugs, centipedes and frogs come to visit. Well, I was so proud of my debugging and cleaning that I felt that the likelihood of any visitors would come in mainly from the front door.   Can you say with me, Wrongo!!!! Well, things were going smoothly until I went in the evening to the bathroom. I turned on the light. Guess what I found…wait for it, wait for it….

            Ah, you may have guessed right. FROGS!!! Everywhere. Like 600 of them. Nah, just kidding. I was freaking out to the 600 level, but there was more like 6 of them. So I looked at them, they looked at me. I slowly closed the door part way so they don’t fly at me, not like they would. But hey, we are in Brazil-The AMAZON. Who knows what tricks they have learned. Yet, every time I see a frog in our bathroom, which in the past it has been about 2 or 3 at a time and I lecture them each time. I tell them, “You know, you really can’t be here. This is my home and you really need to go. I understand you are frogs and in here seems like a nice place to hang out, but you just have to go. (Then I kindly remind them) You are lucky you are not a bug because I would RAID you up like no other. Anyways, so I flicked the light off. I felt creepy crawly goose bumps all up and down my spine. I demanded in a text for Trent to call me. I was freaking out on the phone, telling him that there were SIX HUNDRED frogs in our bathroom. He said in a serious tone, “really?” “600?” I said, “well no I am exaggerating, but it feels like 600”. Then he goes on to ask, “How did they get in there?” I said, “Uh, I don’t know. They are hanging out on my plastic window”. (like they own the joint). Needless to say, he asked if I was okay and told me everything would be okay and that he had to get back to work. Man, who do those frogs think they are?!!! Well, Trent told me that they heard about me and rallied up their friends to come back and taunt (or haunt, you take your pick) me. Either way, I locked myself up in our room, awaiting for him to come home and deal with the problem….My Sherlock holmes intuition tells me that the only way they would have gotten in is through the sink pipe. Can you imagine! Six of them, saying “Hey let’s travel up this lady’s sink pipe and put a little scare on her like she hasn’t felt since she has been here- (then the gang together chant) Yeah, who does she think she is coming in on our turf, lecturing us that we have to leave”. 

So, I need to go the bathroom REALLY BAD!!! But Trent is not home yet to save the day…yikes.

So, when we went to Belem, things were a lot better. I hear Brasilia is a lot better too. It is almost futuristic from what I hear-like George Jetson time. I look forward to maybe visiting there. I really want to check out Rio or Sao Paulo, I hear those are great cities too. A lot more developed.

The theatrics are real, to a certain extent. I go crazy at some things, but I really am doing quite well. I am trying to learn how to adapt. I am trying to love or improve what I have.

For the first time, I have been discriminated against because of my religious affiliation. I didn’t know it would be like that here. I could be handling it worse, but I have chosen to take the point of view that I can respect what others believe and hope someday others can grow up and do the same. (Oh, I need to be careful with my passive-aggressive “grow up” bit.) I just get somewhat flustered with the lack of respect and courtesy for someone’s differences. Yes, I realize that I too have been showing lack of respect because of my complaints about their Brazilian culture at times( but I never do it to them), but at least I am aware it is wrong and I am striving to be humble as much as I can and appreciate the differences for what they are and what I have gained from it. I am learning so much more by being open.

So things have been good, scary, fun, and difficult. The ups and downs are okay because I have been learning from them. I really am enjoying myself. I enjoy most days, and days that I don’t I try to see the good in it, even if it takes me awhile.

Ketchup

Hey ya’ll!

I know you have been waiting a long time for this blog to be updated. We have not received internet at our place, so I thought I would simply write it up in Microsoft, save it, then upload it on a computer with internet access, then post it. So here we go…

The continuation of the flight is as goes:

            The flight took us from Sao Paulo to Rio de Janeiro then onto Belem. About 4-5 hours long because of the stop in Rio, a slight delay from a rainstorm (which had lightning, but I pretended they were flashing light from the plane because I didn’t need any more fear added onto what I was already feeling with flying). After the excitement we had a smooth ride and had chips and Japanese peanuts, and some cookies that were banana and a hint of cinnamon flavor. We arrived in Belem and had to wait a little longer because of the accordion walk way was broken (the machine that you walk through from plane to the airport). We ended up leaving the back of the plane down some stairs. We then walked from ground level,  into the airport. As we walked in, we saw three people holding up an American flag. The three people were friends from Brazil: Raphael (business partner), his cousins Laura and Carol. They were all so excited and happy to see us through the glass. Trent began to cry and I grabbed the video camera from him to record him. He gave Raphael a big hug, then we had to return to get our luggage. When we returned Trent began to cry more and we looked back and the girls were crying too. We grabbed our luggage and went outside with our friends. We awaited for our ride, then because we had too much luggage we grabbed a taxi. The cars here are mostly all small like VWs or Hondas. The three of them had been having a conversation in Portuguese and I stood there in wonder with everything around me. It was something to fear, but be intrigued by. Trent translated everything for me. Raphael and Carol would speak a little English with me, but not much. We arrived to our place and the reason it is about $300 USD is because of the standards it is…I drew a picture to help show the layout of the place, and took a video…

The place we are staying at:

There was a lot of hard work put into finding the place that we are staying, which was the closest to American standard of living, but I walked in and it was hard to get used to, I must say. However, it is something to appreciate compared to everything else around us. I would rather be living here than any other place. The place is about ____ sq ft. So I would say it is about the size of a big front room. Our front room is the size of a two sink bathroom, our kitchen and dining room are about the size of a decent apt. kitchen, and the bathroom is a small bathroom. The sinks are not much. There is a knob, and a spout with only cold or lukewarm water. There is a toilet, but it is like what you see on the movies with a pulling string. The windows do not have glass. The one in the bathroom is stone with designed holes, so connected to the outside and its living creatures (which consist of frogs, mosquitoes, spiders, centipedes, and more, which I have not come to enjoy and gladly spray the Raid we have on the window almost every day as a routine). We don’t even open our bedroom window because I don’t do bugs or other creatures. If it was open there would be no glass, but bars. There is a bar door on the outside of our front door. The bedroom is very decent in size for a bedroom and it has a lovely air conditioner that saves me every day. The fridge is probably the size of two small office refrigerators (for drinks, etc.) stacked on top of each other. Luckily the fridge has a small freezer …opening the fridge is bliss because it feels so nice and COLD. That brings me to my next topic, the weather. It is hot, stuffy, humid, and sticky. The bedroom is my sanctuary to be perfectly honest. Once we leave our room there is a night and day difference with the temperature. I walk out into our kitchen there is a wall of humid, heat that I hit as I walk out and I remember where I am. LOL. I love the night weather when it is slightly cool outside and it is not raining. That is my favorite Brazilian weather.

Continuation of our first night:

            We had some food at the Lonchenette which is a café type place that you can go sit and eat. It was outside and you just sit at a table and chairs that resemble what you find in a backyard for barbecue, the plastic set. We ordered food to stay.  I had a bacon cheeseburger which was done a bit differently than what I have had. It had the basic tomato, lettuce, and patty, etc., but here they cook the bacon in a fried egg and so I had a fried egg along with my hamburger. I was expecting fries, but found on my hamburger these small slices about an inch long and thin that resembled fries. They were sprinkled inside on top of everything. It was pretty good, surprisingly. Around me it was hot, humid, stray dogs and cats walking around.

            We then went to Raphael’s place to use the internet to let everyone know we are safe, but my Facebook wouldn’t work because I am now in Brazil and so it seems like someone else is trying to hack into my account. My security question was something I don’t think I ever chose, it was weird, so we were stuck trying to figure out what to do. Raphael was so kind to let us use his account and I labeled it with “this is Emily”. Then we made two calls. The time difference is 5 hrs so even though it was like 1 am it was still early in the states. We were given a tour of their home and it was nice and decent size. We then were driven home by Adenilson.  

            That night we slept real good that I had a dream within a dream. If you know the Inception movie you would understand why I put it that way.  It was so bizarre. I dreamt that we were in the new place and I had awoken from a dream. I awoke in our place and found a piano and as I tried to play a tune, I noticed it was actually a stove. I was so excited because our actual  place only had a microwave. I then found a maid and so many other things that didn’t exist in our actual reality. I really awoke to find that those things didn’t exist. What a bizarre thing to ever happen to me, but hilarious all at the same time. I think deep down I was desiring those things. I don’t remember if it was this night or a different night, but I turned out the lights and pretended I was back in the US because everything around me was so dramatically different, like the movie The Eye with Jessica Alba. Just try to erase everything. Eventually it was morning and bright to prove I wasn’t dreaming this time, I was back to reality.

           

So all of you must be asking, Emily how are you enjoying everything?

            Well, to be perfectly honest it is not what I had expected. I expected a few things to be so completely different, but I pictured different standard of living even though I knew it was not like life in the USA. There are few things that I like a lot and a few things that I really, really don’t like. The things that I like are pretty much because it is familiar or because they are nice in my opinion.

What I like:

            I like the food. I like the people who I know. I like how welcoming, and nice people are. I haven’t really seen anyone get angry. I wonder if they are so laid back and nice that they just don’t necessarily get mad. I feel like I stand out like a sore thumb because anger comes so quickly. I could learn a lot from them with their ability to control anger. (Now don’t get me wrong I am sure they do get mad, but like I said it is from what I have observed). They truly want to understand and help you feel better. They are nice and good hosts, hostesses. I think it is part of their culture because they are collectivistic. It is about family and friends, relationships. That is something that is appealing.

I like that we have a place that I have learned its tricks to help it work for me which I’ll get to later in more detail. I like the food. I think I already said that. LOL. I like the floral clothing. I think it looks so feminine (need a little extra covering to be modest, but the fabric itself is real cute).

 I like that mostly everyone wants to work in order to obtain a living. They work each day, whether it is through their shops, their selling newspapers, drinks, peanuts, etc. while walking through stopped traffic on the highway. That is impressive. I like the ability to sleep through the night because it is somewhat hot in the room and I am exhausted. (I finally understand why they sleep during the middle of the day and they close shop. The air is so heavy, the temperature is so hot and humid that the energy expended is just gone and you need something to revive yourself.)

 I like our friends. They have been so sweet and nice. I am such a bad example of a estrangeiro (stranger from here, foreigner) or I am like every other average foreigner, or worse-maybe mostly because of the developed country I come from. Well I will get to how my attitude of what I don’t like, but remember this is my “what I like about Brazil” section.

Okay, so I like…our friends because they have tried so hard to help me in more ways than one. They want to help me feel welcome, safe, taken care of, help me feel like I am at home in USA by the little things that they do, they want to help me with the language, they are so nice and reinforcing  when I try to practice, they want to help teach me how to cook, they want me around, they are just really nice. One thing I noticed is that in the US I think we can sometimes be so caught up in technology that we allow relationships with others be put on a back burner. We use technology as entertainment and a part of social gatherings and so much more. Here, they don’t have very much, but they are not like me all put out of place and grumpy about it. They love what they have, but mostly they love each other. They take care of each other and their concern is more about others and the needs of others than themselves. That is something that has impressed me the most. They also are the most gracious hosts, and hostesses that I have ever met. I feel like their family because of how they treat me. I think that is what I like the most. I like church A LOT! Being at church is so great, when things are translated or I can guess and figure it out.  It makes me feel like I am at home. I guess familiarity is so important because if it is different from home. I think all of the uncertainty frightens me.

I will go more over our experience at church a little later.

I like a lot of things and as I discover, adapt or get used to others I am sure I will like them too, but that will probably be at a later time.

I know many of you may be waiting for the things I don’t like, well here we go (please do be patient with me and don’t think too bad of me for my complaints):

            Okay, so the things I don’t like… the MOST adverse thing is the environment. The streets and sidewalks are broken up, smelly, wet, dirty, messy, not eye appealing, many many many bugs on them, and more. The stench is really horrific though. I just can’t understand where the smell comes from. Along with that… is the garbage situation. The garbage is deposited into a grocery bag then placed outside in front of the house in a basket on a poll or thrown on the ground outside in a bag, or just littered. Garbage is not picked up for days and days and days and days. I may be exaggerating the extra day, but honestly from what I can see they just pick up the garbage when they feel like it. The driving on the streets is horrendous. People cutting people off, absolute disregard to traffic laws (stop signs, stop lights, street lanes, and so much more, the speed limits are the worse). The main feeling I get is that it is mostly about survival on the road. The bus rides can be good or terrifying depending upon the bus driver. Since we have to switch and get on different buses all of the time, there is not much consistency of what to expect for the bus ride. They are swerving all over the place, going really fast, almost hitting a motorcyclist in front of them, but they slam on the brakes just in time. They honk to make people get over and move out of their way. If you are walking on the street they will honk at you to get out of the way. They seriously won’t slow down for you. No law for pedestrian safety and if there was it wouldn’t be reinforced or enforced I should say. The main thing I truly dislike is not enough regulations or laws or rules. It is like chaos to a certain extent. Keep in mind that this is the  majority around me, but a good minority want to follow laws or rules. They try to live it because of their conscience. They want to be good. I won’t forget them. I acknowledge it and I am so excited when I see it. I always tell Trent that many of them probably would prefer the USA because of the order. I also tell him when I see things they are doing and “I” don’t approve because if they were in the USA they wouldn’t be able to do that.

( there is a guy who drives a motorcycle with his wife or girlfriend on the back with her holding their child, baby etc. No helmets and I am going bonkers with child endangerment. The open bowl of soup on the bus with no place for this person to sit. ) I don’t want to act as though my country is better than theirs, but I just feel if they had a few more laws or enforcement there wouldn’t be as much craziness as there is. There could be order and organization, effectiveness and efficiency when it comes to completing tasks, etc. When you go places it takes hours. For example, when we go somewhere either bus, walking, or car sometimes, the wait or actual ride takes awhile. Then when we finally get to where we are going they say we can’t do something, or because they are not used to Americans and running certain policies. They don’t know how so it takes forever, or they mostly say we can’t help you. The other day the lady took Trent’s ID saying it was out of date and he couldn’t keep it as a keep sake even if he didn’t use it. Then she wouldn’t give him a new one. I honestly don’t want to leave our place because of these things that take place. They are really behind the times. Third world country is really a third world country when it comes to certain things. The things they are interested in are things from the 80s or 90s. There are some new things though. They have nice TVs, cell phones, and things along that line. I really just want things to be more efficient so time and energy is not wasted. Even when we call to check on things or make an appointment, when we get there they just can’t seem to do anything for us. It really is ridiculous. I told Trent that people get annoyed at DMV in USA, but if they were here they wouldn’t be able to stand it because it is that way for everything. There is no certainty for most things. You can’t check a bus schedule, you don’t have guarantee for whether or not the bus you think will take you where you need to go because it did the day before, but it doesn’t today. It is like a guessing game. It is so DIFFERENT. Sometimes, I just can’t stand it. I want to SCREAM. I micromanage at home. I try to control every little thing at home. I am sure I drive Trent crazy. I try to clean everyday because everyday our place needs it. I feel like I am camping, to a certain extent. I never really enjoyed camping but maybe it will be a piece of cake after this. LOL. However, I don’t know if I would ever get used to the bugs though. I am telling you how things are, and it sounds just terrible to you, I am sure. Just keep in mind that this is Ananadeua  in the North of Brazil which is considered the poor part of Brazil. The rich are South or in Rio or major cities that have a lot of tourists. I am sure my experience at those places will be better. When I go then I will tell you how it is.

I mostly feel bad for everyone else because if they knew how life could be I wonder if they would try to improve their lives. I think a lot of them have an idea of how much better life could be and strive for that. Trent has explained that the reason things are so bad is mostly because of their past. Their government now is a democracy and they are truly trying to improve things here. The construction taking place is improving the real estate here. I think a good amount of the people want better environment. I think they deserve a chance to have better. They all are so grateful for what they do have and are so humble. They are amazing people with unfortunate living circumstances.

January 19-21

            We walked around, shopped for a few things: food, cleaning products, etc. We also tried to figure out paperwork and our Brazilian identification.

            We hung out with the Oliveira family (the mom and daughter). We sat and chatted, well more like Trent and Raphael chatted with them and I sat. Trent would try to translate as much as he could back and forth. We headed home and didn’t get home until 10 pm. I was scared as we walked because people at night are more likely to rob you. They would be in pairs on a bike or motorcycle.

            We shopped for  a few items then interviewed Prisicilla and Keila for the secretary positions. They both did very well and see great potential in each of them, so we hired both with each working part time.

            I went to church for the first time in Brazil. The ward is called Providencia ward. I was introduced to Rita, Mario and their son Clebson (They are adopting him. They were kind of like foster parents since he was born. He was born with cancer and his biological mom left him at the hospital. He had enlarged growth on his neck/face –which we saw in a picture- and as we see him now he is perfectly cured after a Priesthood blessing and looks normal. He was so sweet to us). We also met these three boys who are neighbors to the ward who came to hang out at the church building. Their names are Kevin, Gabriel, and Lucas. Lucas was such a comedian. As Trent was translating the Portuguese conversation into English for me, Lucas was imitating us by moving his lips really fast making a  repetitive blah, blah, blah sound. It was absolutely hilarious. I asked Trent to ask what their names were and he proceeded to ask each one of them in Portuguese. Each boy answered until we got to Lucas. He told Trent that he wanted me to ask him. I asked Trent how to ask for someone’s name in Portuguese, “Qual e seu nome?”, so I asked the young boy and he responded by turning to Trent and telling him something in Portuguese. I was like oh, great I did it wrong. Hahaha. Well, turns out that the boy wanted me to ask for his name in English. So I said, “What’s your name?” He responded in English, “My name is Lucas”. I said, “Wow, good job!” then gave him a high five. We had to get to class. They do their classes backwards from USA. They have Relief Society first, then Sunday school or gospel doctrine, then Sacrament. I thought that was interesting. Neide was the one who sat with me in Relief Society and helped me find the correct hymnal and was super nice. Then Priscilla Oliveira came in and sat next to me. I asked her after the lesson was over for what the lesson was about. She had been showing me the scripture references that the class was referring to, so I was able to kind of guess. They were studying about the temple ordinances and covenants. I thought that was cool. They usually teach their lessons from the Liahona, the church magazine, paired with scriptures. Then Gospel Doctrine was studying the Book of Mormon. That was awesome because what they went over was exactly what Trent and I went over the few days before and we had our own discussion, so I understood what they were discussing. Yeah! I also made new connections not made before….

            We read in 1 Nephi for personal study in chapters 11-14ish and were learning about the tree of life, how Nephi learned about the meaning along with the application to his family. As we read, I began understanding the Nephites and Lamanites. I feel that as I read that I start making a connection to how these people here, are connected to the Nephites/Lamanites or at least some of them. The stories are of their heritage. Reading it and seeing these people is so enlightening. I used to read the scriptures and have the spiritual uplifting feeling and edification, but I understand them better now with my experience here than I did before.